I wrote this piece in an angry rage sitting alone in my room during the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic and the height of the Black Lives Matter movement. I later gave this speech to a protest of around 100 people in Los Angeles and live-streamed a discussion of issues about Black Equality with a member of Netflix Original’s 13 Reasons Why to bring awareness to the heinous treatment of Black Americans in this country by its police officers and its people. Despite it being three years after the start of this movement, brutality against Black folks has not ceased, but rather, heightened. I am in constant fear of the trajectory of this country and this world in regard to racial equality and the carceral institutions that hold Black folks captive. These conversations are as important now as they were back then and should continue to be at the forefront of our minds, policies, and hearts. We cannot and should not give up.
BLACK. LIVES. MATTER.
with love,
syd
AMERIKKKA
A black girl in a white world
The world constantly telling her
She’s unworthy of all there is to offer
And that Black people are born to suffer
At the hands of their white captors
Skin silky smooth and dark
Complexion parallel to a Hershey’s milk chocolate bar
My coarse black hair falls ever so slightly down the sides of my chiseled face
These features alone gave immediate indication of my beautiful Black race
The police on the barricade
Scrutinizing us for the melanin in our skin
A sinister grin plastered on their faces
Categorizing cold-blooded murder as a “win”
If only this sin registered with the cops from within.
But I digress.
The first time I ever saw a police officer, he along with three other white men were violently busting down the front door of my home
I was just 4 years old
My mother lay cold on the bathroom floor, stricken by the blows to her chest and the voices in her head
My father sat beside me, grasping tightly onto my hand as we both watched our biggest nightmare unfold before us
The handcuffs suffocated the slim wrists of my resilient Black mother
Her body limp with defeat
Her mind cluttered with confusion
So much for the American Dream.
The echo of the sirens replays in my head as I scream and I plead for them to be gentle with her
She doesn’t know any better
She isn’t well
But they didn’t listen.
Later I would discover that my mother would be yet another walking statistic of an innocent Black individual, with a debilitating mental illness, rotting within the confines of a prison cell
She waits patiently; counting the days until someone dares to rise up and ring the liberty bell
Yet, the criminal justice system continues to toy with the lives of Blacks as part of a sadistic game
We know who is to blame
LET FREEDOM RING
When will we run free?
Derek Chauvin
A murderer of the second degree
I wish you would just take a moment to see
The hatred and bigotry
Within yourself
Perched high on a mountain of white privilege and wealth
Do you really think that it’s healthy to violently brutalize black people for your own personal enjoyment?
The sad thing is, you deserve so much more punishment.
For your vile conscious and your decision to be a racist officer who abuses power
You should be protecting us
Not killing us
I CAN’T BREATHE.
***REST IN POWER GEORGE FLOYD***
Since my early childhood, I have been held hostage by my distrust in this broken nation that we call AmeriKKKa
A country that oppresses Black people simply because of the color of our skin
A president that outwardly vocalizes his hatred for women, LGBTQ, and other POC
A society that frowns upon Black women for “raising their voice”
A community where Black boys fear for their lives walking home from school
A justice system that fails to protect innocent Black men who end up serving time for crimes they didn’t commit
A world that fetishizes Black music, Black fashion, and Black culture, yet, refuses to speak out about the injustices that are disproportionately KILLING thousands of our people.
THIS. IS. AMERICA.
I feel as if for so long I was taught to suppress my identity as a Black female
for the sake of being accepted by my white peers
The hours I’d spend before school straightening my thick Black hair so that the condescending remarks about its ugliness would cease
The way in which I trained myself to address people using proper English to not be mistaken as “ghetto” or “ratchet”
The constant shaming of my body for not conforming to the “tall, thin, blonde” stereotype that all the boys in school would swoon over
Coming to the realization on Christmas of 2008 that my life would be nothing more than settling for a fair-skinned doll that looked nothing like me: simply because no one could be bothered to offer the same level of compassion to young Black and brown girls
Placing my hands abruptly on the dash of my car if I am ever pulled over by police, fearful of the gun holstered at their waist
Praying for the safety of my Black teenage brother. every. single. day.
And the list continues
But my silence will not.
What you are witnessing is the unraveling of a lifelong system of oppression, therein placing a (much-needed) emphasis on the fact that black people have been and still are treated inhumanely in this country- both by the government and its people.
If you don’t recognize the reality of being black in America
Or if you don’t feel inclined to use your platform to educate yourself and others
Then you are doing a grave disservice.
Please don’t be ignorant. Support the Black community in our fight for justice.
Most importantly, remember that it’s not just about supporting Black people…
Support members of the LGBTQ community
Support other racially marginalized groups
Support individuals and families from low socioeconomic backgrounds
Support those with a form of mental or physical illness
Support women and children
Support families who have lost loved ones to police violence, regardless of background
Support those who are deeply hurting during this time.
WE CAN AND SHOULD DO BETTER.